Join the Madness

Monday, August 11, 2014


I really did it this time, folks.  For an intelligent woman, I do some really stupid stuff sometimes.  Case in point:

We didn't over-plan our vacation, but we did have a few must-have stops on the list.  One was a tour of Paramount Studios and the other was a trip to the beach.  

If you've not been to L.A., let me give you one piece of advice:  if you find a bathroom, use it.  Every time.  Even if you don't have to go.  Back here in the Midwest, public bathrooms are a way of life.  Everywhere you go there's a restroom open -- and most are nice!  Not so L.A.  In order to keep the homeless away from their businesses, none of them let the public use their facilities.  In fact, they will look you straight in the eye and swear they don't have any toilets at all...but you know that can't be true -- who can hold it through an 8 hour shift at work?

So anyway, we had planned for a morning tour of Paramount, then lunch, then the beach.  I decided the most prudent course of action would be to put my swimsuit on under my clothes so I wouldn't have to hunt out a mythical restroom to change into it later.

Three of us had near bladder explosions before Paramount.  We searched for an hour but couldn't find a public restroom.  My daughter even downloaded a bathroom app on her phone!  I congratulated myself on the bathing suit scheme.  I was ready to go, even if we didn't find another restroom.

I had a little wardrobe malfunction when I took my t-shirt off in the beach parking lot.  This was a new suit, so I didn't think anything of it.  Just made a mental note to watch the straps a little more carefully.

But once in the water I noticed not only did the straps seem to be placed weird, they were SEE THROUGH.  Oh my.  But then, after bouncing in the waves for 10-15 minutes I figured it out.

I'd gotten dressed in the dark and put my swimsuit on BACKWARDS.  

I think I owe a public apology to everyone who was at Venice Beach that day.....


Dianne K. Salerni said...

Yikes -- on backwards, huh? But I'm sure the people at Venice beach didn't bat an eye. It's L.A. They've probably seen everything!

Tamara Narayan said...

Ha! That's so funny. It reminds me of when my children were babies and toddlers. I knew where every public restroom for stores, restaurants, and parks were located just in case--and they always had to go. In fact, I think I spent most of their toddler years in bathrooms.