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Thursday, January 26, 2012

Irrational Fears

Vicki Rocho's Thirteen Completely Irrational Fears 
  1. Outhouse style bathrooms (the seat will fall in and I'll die a horrible death)

  2. Sewers - I'll slip and fall and meet a horrible disfiguring death -- or the sewer rats will eat me while I'm unconscious from bumping my head on impact

  3. Metal grates in sidewalks -- they'll collapse and I'll fall to my death

  4. Spiders - they're watching me. They know what I've done to their kinfolk and they're plotting against me.

  5. Public fights -- I don't stand to watch because someone might pull a gun and I'll get shot

  6. Roads that curve to the left -- especially if there's any kind of drop off on the right side of the car.  Again, falling and death figure prominently

  7. Lice - It's been almost two years since we got invaded, but I STILL examine my hairline every morning.  Talk about post-traumatic stress disorder

  8. Things in my eye - Not only will I never order contacts, but I'll never go in for laser surgery.  The thought of ANYTHING touching my eyeball gives me the willies

  9. Coughing up a bug - You know how they say we swallow spiders and things in our sleep?  I'm always scared I might cough one up.  I'd need therapy afterward, and I'm not even kidding

  10. Losing my teeth - I have these horrible dreams where my teeth just sort of crumble away.  I go to the dentist regularly, so I don't know where this comes from, but at least it doesn't involve my potential demise!

  11. Stuff on my toothbrush.  I rinse it off when I'm done, and store it in a cabinet so the chances of anything gross getting on it are minimal, but I still rinse it REALLY well before I put the toothpaste on.

  12. Things in my shoes. Specifically creepy crawly things. I shake and pound them before I stick my tootsies inside.

  13. Breaking the sink.  When I lean over to spit into the sink after brushing my teeth, I'm paranoid the sink will break off like it does in the movies.  It's a wall-mounted sink and original to the house (which is older than I am) so this might not be completely irrational.

What about you? Any irrational fear you want to 'fess up to?


Nicole MacDonald said...

*ROTFLMAO* Oh I love these posts, Vicky!
Wanna hear something really evil?
*hee* You know that cute little cabin we have in the bush here in NZ?
Well it used to have a long drop (we've upgraded to a flush - but you still have to walk to it ;p) and in summer, not surprisingly, it attracted flies.
The best prank in the world (to a kid) was to wait for a newbie to the cabin to go to the loo. Then you snuck up behind and booted the back of the corrugated iron outhouse a couple of times so that the flies in the bottom of the loo would zoom up and hit the poor buggar on the loo in the butt. *hee* OMG that made us laugh!
Damsel in a Dirty Dress

mish said...

This is really funny! *giggles*
I have a fear of some creepy crawlies and some flying insects, especially the ones that flap their tiny wings ARGH!I always imagine it stuck down the back of my dress, flapping against my skin *shudders*

Sarah Pearson said...

Oh no, I have a ton of irrational fears, but now you've given me some new ones to think about. I hadn't even considered coughing up a bug!

vic caswell (aspiring-x) said...

the teeth falling out is something... i know i've read that before... like your subconscious is trying to act out your fear of failure or something... i can't remember.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Those were funny! Heights and bugs bother you, don't they? And there's nothing wrong with checking your shoes. What if there WAS a bug???

DL Hammons said...

Are you afraid of left-field? Because that's where those must have come from!! :)

Val said...

I have an irrational fear of driving on the highway. I used to commute an hour to St. Louis every day. Then one day, I flipped out. I don't know why. The fear is like claustrophobia. I'm trapped without an exit. What if I have a medical emergency? Just thinking about it gives me a medical emergency.