Join the Madness

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Things I'd like to see - Part III

I'm back with more inventions that really ought to be on the market.

1- I'd love a home theater, but since I don't have one, I wish my local video store would have a party room I could rent to watch movies on a big screen.  It'd only need to seat 10-20.  They could rent the room for $25 for 2 hours -- throw in the movie for free and add a concession stand.  Way cheaper than the movie theater and you don't need to remodel your home! 

2-Kinda related to #1, I used to wish that movie theaters would have a room in the back for parents with babies/unruly kids to go to.  They could watch through a window, and not disturb the rest of the audience.

3-They probably have this, I never go looking to see if my ideas have already made it to market on someone else's blood, sweat, and tears.  I love my computer, but I miss my typewriter.  It made such a beautiful rhythmic click clack (notice I did not add the moo), that really motivated me to keep typing.  Therefore, I would love an app that will give that old fashioned typewriter sound to my laptop. 

4-For all you crafters out there:  I want a glue gun in the shape of a pencil, not a gun.  The "trigger" would be down near the tip.  I think this design would give you way more control over where the glue goes and with a more cylindrical design, the glue sticks could be longer without being unwieldy.  Don't you hate constantly having to load a new one?

5-I think teachers ought to embrace technology.  Nearly all students (at the high school level anyway) have cell phones.  I propose the teachers give paperless tests.  They can display the questions on a projector and have students text in their answers.  Essays will have to be done the old-fashioned way, I'm afraid.

6-This one I SERIOUSLY want to see happen.  So someone PLEASE take this and run with it!  Have you ever been driving along and been surprised by a cop car or ambulance racing up behind you in the rear view mirror? Or maybe you hear the siren but you don't know which direction it's coming from?  My idea is to have emergency vehicles send out a signal on a radio channel so if you are within a 1 or 2 mile radius of the vehicle, you will get an announcement on your radio saying something like "Emergency vehicle traveling east on Main Street".  Now that GPS is common technology, this should be possible.  Think how many accidents can be avoided!

7-I want an internet timer.  It would attach itself to the family computer and would be activated not unlike arcade games.  Each token would be good for a length of time (to be determined by parents) and when the time was up, the device would power down.  I would use this mostly to police the kids on the internet, but it could just as easily be attached to TVs or gaming consoles.  Tokens would come in different colors so you could give each kid a specific color to keep them from swiping each other's tokens. Oh, and there is a manual override for parents.

8-This is more of a prediction than an actual want.  It's no secret that we live in a vain society.  Just look at all the ads for diet pills, wrinkle reducing cream, etc.  So I got to thinking about extremes of vanity and wondered if there is anyone who has gone to these lengths.  In the movies, make up artists and special effects masters often use silicone masks (or bits like a deformed nose/ear) to create the character they need.  Usually it's a monster they're creating, though sometimes they do it to make someone look significantly older/heavier than they are.  

I predict that it won't be long before people have silicone masks of themselves custom made before they die, so that they will appear younger and more vibrant for their funeral viewing. I'm thinking the silicone might provide a more supple appearance than actual skin can provide.  Again, not a want, just a prediction.

9-I wish newspapers would let you subscribe to just the paper sections you wanted.  I understand it's probably too labor-intensive to sort all these custom papers, but a girl can dream. 

10-I'd like there to be an agency similar to an employment agency, only it's for volunteers.  You could go in for an assessment, to see what sorts of tasks you are qualified to volunteer for and they could call you when they had a position for you.  People in the community could call in when they needed extra help with something.  But what I'd REALLY like to see is a way for you to reduce your tax obligation through volunteering.  Schools and government agencies are short-staffed.  Surely there are plenty of projects that don't require experience.  You spend one day a week making copies for teachers at the school or mopping floors or filling potholes with a crew.  The school/government gets a much-needed task done at no additional expense and you get a valuable tax credit.

What would YOU like to see?


Carole Anne Carr said...

All and more of the above. When you said theatre I immediately thought of those cardboard and wooden toy theatres I adored as a child. Such happy memories. I recently bought one for a friend's child and hope I had started a long love affair with theatre and all things creative. :0)

aspiring_x said...

ohmygoodness! that silicone mask thing gave me the heebeejeebies!! that could make for an interesting story! -especially if criminals used the masks to disguise the true victims of their crimes! mwha ha ha ha!!!

Bish Denham said...

That last one, a volunteer agency, now THAT's a GREAT idea!

Mary Vaughn said...

These are great, Vick!
#2 - If asked to take their kids there would probably tell you where to go -- and it wouldn't be that room!
#8 - I'll bet there are certain members of our society who are already wearing those in public, and not for their funerals. ;0) They'd be better off with the mask than these botched up Botox injections!

salarsenッ said...

#1 is a great idea. Really. That'd be cool.

I totally agree with you about a glue gun. What really were they thinking. Yeah, a pencil would be much cleaner. LOL

Matthew Rush said...

There actually are some theaters that have the rooms you describe in number 2. They're called cry rooms.

Jenna Wallace said...

I am totally into #7, saying "Great idea! I could just give myself one token in the morning so I don't fritter away my writing time..." and then I read on and saw "police the kids." Um, yeah, that too. But really fab idea. For me.

Janet Johnson said...

I've been wanting #2 for a while now . . . 7 years to be exact. :)

And wow, #10? Brillian, my friend. Brilliant. Are you sure you don't want to run for president? The 2012 election is coming up fast!

Lenny Lee* said...

hi miss vicki! yikes! you got so much cool ideas. youre always thinking. i like that volunteer one lots not cause of tax stuff just cause it cool to help. for me i could with you could just only pay for tv channels you want and not all those ones i dont watch. yikes! i could surf so much channels and not find one thing i could wanna watch. ack!
...hugs from lenny

Carolyn V said...

I'm totally good with fat free chocolate. I think it's in the near future. That's my prediction and I'm sticking to it. =)

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

#6 and #10 are brilliant ideas!
And for #2, can the chatty people with cell phones go hang out behind the window with the babies?

Dawn said...

If I was a billionaire, I would front the cash for ALL of these inventions!

Jules said...

I'm sorry these were so brilliant I laughed all the way through. I really love that death mask idea and now I'm off to find me a maker. :)
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

Brillian ideas, Vicki! I love number 6!!! I always get in a panic when I hear a siren...never knowing what direction it's coming from and where I need to move to to get out of its way.

Nick Thomas said...

You can get the clicking keyboard here:

And Happy Presidents Pets Day - the day after Presidents Day, as I like to call it. In the US, we love our presidents..... pets. See my blog if you’re in the mood for a good ol' irreverent howl.